If you want a meaningful life, you must create situations that make you uncomfortable.

Here is today’s Game and what’s going on.

This is what I learned from Dave Hollis‘ book, Get Out of Your Own Way.

Today’s highlights and declaration come from the book’s second chapter, titled “Lie #4: A Drink Will Make This Better.”  Let’s jump in:

• My vices exist to quiet the things I don’t want to deal with.
• Unfortunately, though, in my experience, coping that shows up as a negative character trait often leads us to believe we are, in fact, negative ourselves. A vice that shows our defects can make us believe we are defective. That creates a nasty circle and makes it feel even harder to keep on the path toward growth.
• Growth happens outside our comfort zones and is the only way to fulfillment—I know these things to be absolute truths—and yet I’m in the midst of my full submersion in this pursuit and can tell you, it’s hard. It’s hard to sit in places that you don’t know; it’s hard to try things you haven’t tried before. It’s hard to grow.
• In chasing all the things that will help me grow, I have to work harder now than ever to stay out of my own way. You’ll have to work harder than ever as well.
• There is no controlling this new constant that is the chaos of our life.
• It’s hard to have a mirror held up to your face. Hard to deal with the ridiculous things we do when we let our unconscious minds make bad choices for our lives. It’s not fun to be called on the carpet, but it’s necessary.
• You need to save yourself.
• Whatever your vice, your coping mechanisms, the set of habits that don’t serve you or the ones you love, it’s on you. It will be hard and take work, but it starts with you choosing to do the work and take control.
• It is impossible to close off your anxiety without also eliminating the growth that comes from fully experiencing discomfort.
• The need to numb drastically reduces when you actually believe growth is supposed to be uncomfortable.
• We all have a coping mechanism that, if we leave it unattended, can spin into something that gets in our way. If you’re stuck behind a lie that has you using food, drugs, sex, sleep, passive aggression, self-harm, bad hygiene, withdrawal, or anything else to keep you from processing the thing you need to feel to grow, choose discomfort over coping. Choose growth over the unhealthy things that are going to keep you in your own way. It won’t be easy. It will be worth it.

THINGS THAT CAN HELP YOU

1. Get to the rotor why you turn to vices. Learn to ask yourself what better answers might exist. Substitute those—working out, sitting in therapy, talking with a mentor, being honest with my business partner/wife—for the impulse to drink and mute.

2. Keep coming back to the devastating impact of muting life in an attempt to avoid a single thing. The muting of the bad also comes with the unwanted muting of all the good. Making choices that could minimize the good just to control the bad isn’t going to bring out the best in your life, so  don’t walk down that road.

3. Commit to a team of accountability partners for the areas where you struggle. Stack the odds in your favor to train yourself to make choices that serve you, supported by the people in your life who can help you get where you’re hoping to go.

That leads us to today’s Dadly Daily Declaration:

A life of growth means a life of exhilarating discomfort.

If you want a meaningful life, you must create situations that make you uncomfortable. Comfort is a casualty of growth.

If you aren’t willing to put your comfort at risk, you’d better prepare yourself to settle for a mediocre life. I don’t want mediocre. You don’t either. If we’re going to chase more, it’s going to come with the reality that we’ll have to risk more. We’re going to have to risk our usual, safe, normal lives. It’s going to feel uncomfortable—because that’s where the growth comes from. Muting discomfort doesn’t feed growth; it stifles it.